Posts Tagged ‘mental-health



21
Jun
12

Community and Support

Community and support.  I had no idea what those two words really meant outside of community = neighborhood and support = a helping hand if needed.

Since I started my fitness journey, I’ve come to see both of those words in a completely different light.

Community now means a group of people who support each other in a common goal. 

That means the good, bad and the ugly too. 

There are some folks out there than can simply go it alone.   I’ve found that I am much better as part of a community.

Higher goals, higher level of accountability, higher levels of support, both give and take.

If you are just starting out, find a group to get involved with.  Whether its classes at your gym or online forums or joining a CrossFit box.   

Don’t expect everyone to coddle you, don’t expect everyone to check on you when you are down.  If you need support reach out instead of having a pity party. 

People cannot read your mind and know if you are having a lack of motivation, feelings of discontent or even a life crisis.  Your support group will rely on you to let them in on what’s happening.  And trust me, everyone eventually has a lack of motivation.

These two ladies are two of my dearest friends, they are from other states.  We’ve been a part of the same fitness support group for years.  We all met up in DC for the Marine Corps Marathon in 2011.  Here they are coming across the finish line. 

Community and support!  Get some!

 

18
Jun
12

Truth!

One thing is on my mind today.  That is truth.  Truth is what you do when no-one is watching, reading or listening.

I work myself up in to a tizzy sometimes over lack of results both with nutrition and workouts, when in truth I am not holding myself to the level of discipline needed to achieve those results.

Does that mean I’m a train wreck?  No, absolutely not.  It means perhaps that I’m being complacent.  It means I’m not focusing with intent to a specific goal and/or it means I’m not taking things to the next level.  I’m just hanging out in my current comfortable place.

Truth is that it’s time for me to get back to the task at hand with no excuses.  In reading “Switch” by Chip & Dan Heath, I find that little ah-ha moments come to light.  I had one of those this weekend.  The average person (myself included) wants an open-ended criteria when goal setting especially where diet and exercise are concerned. 

In example,  “I will work on running 4 miles without stopping” = open-ended instead of saying “I will run 3 days per week until I reach my goal of 4 miles in 3 months”.

Or “I will cut back on sugar” open-ended instead of saying “I will only consume natural sugars from fruit or honey”.

Truth is TRUTH. 

There is no way to know what I’m capable of until I make that goal black & white.  I’ve notoriously made my goals escapable.  Funny thing is that I am very successful at being an escape artist.  And that my dear friends will hold you back from your morphing efforts.

I like the freedom of truth.  I like the self-honesty of truth.  Truth keeps me on my toes.   Truth is success. 

I like knowing where I am and each time I take a look at the truth I grow exponentially.

15
Jun
12

Finally Friday!

What a challenging week this has been!  My spousal unit has been battling kidney stones for the past 4 weeks.  Two trips to the ER and still no stone passage.  Talk about upsetting the whole apple cart and my training routine!   Long sleepless nights will do that. 

Dealing with someone in serious pain can wreak havoc on a positive attitude.  Out of respect and concern for my spousal unit I found myself keeping extremely quiet in an effort to prevent from disturbing him.  The quieter he got the quieter I stayed. 

I didn’t realize until just this morning that the effort has begun to take a toll on my mindset.  Normally I am a very positive person but the missed workouts, sporadic meals, trips to the ER and trips to the drugstore along with the medicine bottles and paraphernalia sitting in the bathroom, I realize even more how very precious a fit mind and fit body truly are.  I recognize even more how important it is to eat and drink the right things to properly nourish our bodies.

I’m resolved to make-up my missed workouts over the weekend and I actually look forward to spending some time in garage gym 107.  It’s got great MOJO.  It’s got a great way of breaking me down with a barbell and kettlebells and a pull-up bar, yet builds me up and makes me stronger.

This weekend I’m going to add something new.  I’m going to make some homemade Bulgarian Sandbags.  They look like just the ticket to mix things up a bit and will give me an outdoor project.

The interesting thing will be varying the material used to fill the bags so that I can make them full, but different weights.  I’ll report back and let you know how this project ends up.

If you are heading in to the weekend and feeling sad or down and out, get outside and move.  Whatever it takes to get some fresh air and renew your spirit!

14
Jun
12

It’s Not About the Weight

Only DataI think back on the number of times I jumped on the scale and waited with held breath for that thing to tell me something I considered good.  And I remember the days I didn’t perceive the results as positive.  It took me several years to figure out that the scale is simply a data gathering tool. 

Have realistic expectations.  In the beginning I literally thought I could lose over 150# in 3 months.  Yes, I was that naiveHaving or showing a lack of experience, judgement or information.  

My personal experience , which I am elated to share with you is that it takes more time than most women are willing to invest in themselves but that doesn’t have to be YOU.  

YOU can choose to be one of those women that resets your mind and commits to long-term success as opposed to a short-sighted solution. 

Women in general give so much credit and power to the scale that they will literally throw away months of hard work and effort if that scale doesn’t tell them what they want to hear.  I’ve been there.  The scale does not dictate your success or perceived failure.  STOP doing that to yourself!!

There are so many other things you are changing with fitness and clean eating.  

– Your body is getting healthier inside. 

– Your soul is happier because YOU are taking care of YOU and not waiting around for someone else to do it for you.

– You are gaining self-confidence with each workout and each clean meal you choose to eat.

– You can overcome set-backs.

– You are opening yourself up to new experiences.

– You are opening yourself to meeting new people.

– You can control your weight, your food and the outcome of both.

– You can trust and believe in YOU!

12
Jun
12

Don’t Worry Be Happy

Sounds easy right?  Well during the night last night I tossed and turned and churned through a list of worrisome issues.  Guess what?  I didn’t solve a single one of the worries and lost a good nights sleep to boot.

What is really interesting though is that I got up this morning and was teetering on the verge of moody tears.  Everyone that knows me on a personal level knows that I’m not a weepy person.  I’ve raised three boys, I’m known for being rather terse at times.

I’m also known for being that hard*** person that gets things done instead of whining about what else needs to be done in addition to working out, working for a living,  clean eating, loads of laundry, groceries, dealing with a wrecked automobile, etc.  

I realized this morning when I got up that I had allowed myself to worry in to an uncharacteristic mood.  After acknowledging that I woke up in a dark place to one of my friends, I begin making a mental list of what is going on.

It is absolutely amazing to me that something as simple as a listing of what’s going on can help me see what takes priority. 

– What is needed to sustain life?  Got it?  Yep.  Asking myself that one question completely changed my mindset.  YES, IT’S THAT EASY. 

My goodness how quickly we can be sucked into worry and get lost.   We fail to see the positive by focusing on the worrisome issues.

– I have a healthy body and can take most of the physical load I place on it day in and day out.

– I have a day job that I choose to be good at.

– I love writing this cheesy little blog because it keeps me honest and reminds me of how far I’ve come. 

– I love reading other awesome blogs out there like Cultfit.com.

– I love proving to people you can overcome obesity once you stop playing the blame game.

– I love seeing the positive side as opposed to wasting perfectly good energy on worry.

Worry changes nothing outside of the wrinkles on your face.  Act on what you CAN change now.  Once you start acting on what you can change, you realize you are far more capable than you give yourself credit for.

 

 

 

 

11
Jun
12

Two Steps Forward, One Step Backwards

Over the past few weeks I’ve been plugging along doing my thing.  I’ve also noticed that I haven’t been as passionate about my thing as I normally am.

Just this morning I remembered that some times you take two steps forward and one step back. 

I used to think that this was a negative, you know, to take a step back.  Over time I’ve learned that in reality it’s my mental mojo getting a running start for the next round of progress getting ready to take place.  

Think about it.  We can’t always be on the high tide.  If we were, we’d lose sight of how awesome that high tide is.  Down time allows us to really think about where we are and what we want to happen next.  It doesn’t have to be a huge transition to another set of big goals.  

It can be something as simple as a commitment to yourself to do XYZ over the next 3 months.   

For me I tend to train hard and heavy for four months and then go into this feeling of limbo like training for a couple of weeks.  I believe that limbo is my mind and body taking a much deserved break from the cycle of training I put it through.

After that two week slow down, I feel a renewed surge of desire and passion to get back to the hard and heavy training.  It’s funny, until I started writing this blog I didn’t really pay that much attention to the cycle.  But looking back to have a clearer perspective to write from, I’ve had this cycle going strong for 4 years now.

Not too bad for a former yo-yo’er.  Perhaps the true beauty in this realization is that the old, fat, tired and lazy me would have used this limbo period as a reason to quit.  The commitment to what I’ve become won’t allow the limbo to be perceived as anything other than a short, less intense training phase.  

Life feels too good during the high tide to do anything other than just paddle until the next big wave hits.

05
Jun
12

Change “IS” Hard

I talk to so many people about fitness, health and weight-loss.  Interestingly enough I have found that on average when the going gets tough, people literally stop as opposed to getting uncomfortable. 

It’s the rare occasion when someone will choose discomfort and success over the just giving up on themselves. 

The thing that I’ve found to be most common even with myself is I get to a crossroads and have to decide to get more uncomfortable.  I’ll ponder for a day or five about “what now?” and those moments usually come when I feel like my progress is stalled out.  I’m not talking about scale progress.  I’m talking about fitness progress of getting stronger or faster or it’s as simple as if my form has improved.   And of course the ultimate goal is always to remain injury free.

I came to this fitness game a little late, mainly because I spent 10 good years battling the shame and insecurity of being heavy.  Sure, I shed the weight consistently, but it took me a bit longer to shed the insecurity. 

A really good friend told me this morning that she had recently seen a young woman with a tattoo that read “I am the hero of this story, I don’t need to be saved”.   Every person should feel that way about themselves and be that confident in their own ability to take care of themselves. 

I believe that most people have the ability to choose whether they get fit or not.  And the average person sometimes needs a good nudge from someone who will be brutally honest with them to get them jump started.

All throughout the process I had to learn to stop taking things so personally all the time.   When you get really fat, you get really sensitive whether you willingly admit that or not. 

Sometimes that sensitivity can become a crutch and it will hold you back.  It takes courage to step back and ask yourself “I am being the best that I can be or am at a least headed in that direction?” from an objective stand point.

I do this on a regular basis now but in the beginning it took a couple of objective people to kick me in the pants.  One was an internet acquaintance that I met while doing multiple Body-for-Life Challenges.  He basically said “If you don’t like your results, what are you going to do about it?”.  

After I won the 2009 Body-for-Life challenge another friend took me to a track and showed me beyond doubt that I was a long, long way from my physical limits and potential.  Initially I took this process very personally because I was overly sensitive.  The fat chick in my head said “you have a ton more work to do so why don’t you just quit now?”  The fighter in me said “I will not quit, not now, not ever!” and off I went to get even better. 

And most recently was one of my very best friends Michelle (see the link to the right) said to me “what if this is as good as it gets for you?”  It was at that moment that I realized I was not where I wanted to be, but at some point in my life I will inevitably get that point. 

It was a great moment of realization.  Fitness doesn’t always have to get tougher and tougher, heavier and heavier or faster and faster.  Sometimes it just has to get healthier and healthier from the mind, not the food you eat, not the workouts you do but from the thoughts you think. 

Your actions are driven by your thoughts.  Be sure you’re thinking the positive thoughts that will take you to your goals.

25
May
12

One of Those Moments

Rewind to yesterday.  I was driving home from the gym after my workout and noticed a large gentlemen slowly making his way down the walking path next to the road.  He wasn’t walking, he was doing his best to jog.   He’s heavy, really heavy. 

That little voice that gets me in trouble some times started whispering “pull over, pull over and tell him don’t quit!” but the rational side said “that man will think you’ve lost your mind” so I kept going.  But I never stopped thinking about that guy.  All day yesterday I thought about his red and black clothing and I remembered my first year in the gym.  I wanted to cheer for him.  I wanted to be his biggest fan yesterday.

This morning I was working out and I turned around and thought “OMG!!  That is the dude that was running down the street!!”.  He was there in the gym in the flesh.

I waited for him to finish his time on the elliptical and went over to him and asked if he was the guy going down the road and he said yes.   

I know he thought I was pretty close to crazy because my eyes filled up with tears and I just looked at him and told him a little bit of my story and I said “just don’t quit, no matter who or what interferes with what you are doing here today or any other day, just don’t give up because if I can do it, you can”. 

I left him to his workout and went on to finish mine.  He’s probably never going to set foot in that gym in the early morning again thinking that crazy woman might be there.  But I don’t think he’ll ever forget that. 

You know I think back on the people who have encouraged me and it humbles me every time I do.  People I have met either in the gym or online.  Many of the online friendships developed in to real life friendships.  Support groups, friends, mentors all in it to help one another along.  One of my friends said to me “Each one, Reach one”.  I know she will read this and I know she will know I’m talking about her.

Living fit daily can be challenging, but those challenges can be overcome.  Every single day I get up with the intention of being more fit today than I was yesterday, mentally, physically or emotionally in some way.   I’m not always perfect, but I am always consistent.  Consistency wins the race.  I’m living proof of that.

24
May
12

Lost That Loving Feeling

Strange title for the morphing of a fit woman, but it’s so fitting.   I haven’t shared this with my friends and some will likely read it here first.   Of late I’ve lost that loving feeling for CrossFit.  insert a sharp intake of breath…

I’ve heard that it’s just a phase and will pass but in the meantime I want that feeling back.  That joy of having my booty handed to me on any given day.   That joy of accomplishment, that passion for beating me yesterday.  It’s been almost two weeks since I set foot in the box.   That’s just not me.  I’ve been going at least 3 times a week for almost 2 years and suddenly I’m drawn to something just a little less stressful.

I finally had an epiphany this morning and I’m relieved.  Over the past two months my day job (as I call it) has gotten exponentially more stressful.  Our company acquired another company and blah, blah, blah which is equal to my work-load almost doubling.  I’m good for it, up for the task.   What I realized just this morning is that I may not be cut out for two stressful activities at once.

I feel certain that my crossfitting friends reading this will now set about an intervention.  They all know how hard I’ve worked over the past 2 years and won’t allow me to sit by the way side.  I just need to determine exactly the right mix of stressors for me between the day job and the CrossFit.

The sheer fact that I finally figured out that I had lost the loving feeling and why is huge progress.  People get bored and need a change.  I don’t get bored with CrossFit.  I love it, I have loved it since day one.  

Now to figure out the path back to that loving feeling.  

You see, doing nothing to isn’t an option.  I’ve been doing strength and skill work and all the while eating clean but it’s just not CrossFit or the excitement surrounding it. 

I spent too many years fighting my way out of the mess I made of my body to not care for it and nurture it every day.